Gone
I knew this would happen, it always does. But he, he was different. He was special.
But I went to far with the pushing away and he just faded. I blame myself. I shouldn't have pushed him away! Why do I push people away?
It's too late now. He's gone.
Those were my thoughts when I went to go visit my grandmother, she lives in a log cabin on the outskirts of town. A very beautiful place, reminds me of a fairytale with all the plants around.
My grandmother is quite old. In her seventies. But she is such an amazing woman.
But when I visited her she had the mind of a teenager.
She asked about Tayn - my ex.
I told her the story about him leaving. Then she turned to me and said; "he didn't leave because he wanted to. He left because he thinks it will make you happier!" I was surprised my what she said. She continued; "you love him, I know you do. This is what you have to do..." She explained over tea and biscuits and when we were done she hugged me and whispered "go get him" in my ear.
That is why today I am driving to his house, I need to speak to him.
When I get to his house I run up to the door and knock five times.
And I wait.
It's been a week since I last saw him. My heart thunders in my chest. I take a deep breath.
I'm about to knock again when the door opens.
"Jule... What are you doing here?" He stands in the doorway looking sexy as ever.
"Tayn, we need to talk..." I look into his beautiful eyes.
"Uhm... Now?" He glances over his shoulder. I peek over his shoulder to and see nothing.
"Well... Yeah, I was hoping that we could--" I am cut off when a girl walks out of the kitchen.
"Hey Jule!" She waves, her other hand holding a bowl of popcorn.
My best friend, Kasey, is in his house.
Tayn cringes.
"I see..." I start backing away towards my car.
Tayn's eyes dart to mine.
"No, no, no. It's not like that Jule! Please, her and I are just friends!" He runs towards me.
I look at the ground.
"Look at me" he tips my head up. "We are just friends" he says, spacing the words out.
Tears well in my eyes.
"You and I started as friends too..." I say and pull away from him.
I leave him standing in the middle of his driveway.
The next day I decide I'm not going to be upset about it.
I pick myself up as if nothing happened.
I go to work as normal and then I go to the Corner Cafe for my usual lunch.
When I walk in I see Tayn, sitting at my usual table.
"You know, you are very predictable." He smiles. I debate on whether to walk out or to stay.
Hearing him out wins and I sit in front of him.
"Okay, I am sorry, I am sorry I left. And I'm sorry you had to see Kasey at my house. There really isn't anything going on between her and I. But I should've told you before. But, I miss you. Honestly, I do. Everything reminds me of you. Hell, I can't even look out my window without remembering what you said about the lone tree in my yard!" I smile. "And this feeling I have right now? It hurts. It hurts every day we're not together. But I am scared I'll make you run. I don't want to lose you Jule. Even if this don't go back as they were. Can we at least stay friends. Because I want to at least keep one promise I made to you. That I'll always be here for you. Always." He remembers his promise!
I don't know what to do. What to say.
"Tayn... I... I Trust you" the words tumble out of my mouth. But it is the truth. I trust him. I've never trusted anyone before. But I trust him.
His eyes widen.
He reaches out and takes my hand.
"Thank you!"
After lunch together we take a stroll through the park.
He's holding my hand and I have butterflies in my stomach.
We stop at the fountain.
"I don't know if this is the right thing to say right now. But I have to say it before I lose you again." He takes both of my hands. "I Love you" as soon as he says it my heart flutters and I jump into his arms.
"I Love you too!" I whisper as he wraps his arms around me.
He isn't gone. He never was. He was just trying to help me.
He always is. Always has. Always will.
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